I won’t lie to you, getting to happily single in my thirties hasn’t been an easy journey. In fact, at times it has been bloody hard work. Which is why I don’t just write about how I got to thriving in solo living. Because for a long time, I lived in single ‘Get me the hell out of here!’ mode.
There is so much single stigma, shame, misassumption and a deeply negative narrative surrounding being single, which all feeds this idea we have that single is the worst place to spend any time in. It’s a shit ton to unpack and unravel. But honestly, self-dating and seizing singledom has been the most quality and empowering kind of dating I’ve ever done.
The book is coming soon … currently titled, ‘The Single Life Reimagined: From Surviving to Thriving’. Until then, here you’ll find hundreds of blogs on what being single life has been for me. This is unabridged, totally unfiltered, pure real talk on every aspect of the single AF life.
There Is Nothing Wrong With You Being Single
No-one seemed to mind when I was single at sixteen, eighteen, or twenty one. Single at thirty five though, that shit gets people questioning what the heck is wrong with you. And that single stigma only seems to heighten with age. Because there is something about being single, especially once you …
The Things You Are Doing Whilst Single, Do Not Deserve Any Less Celebration
However, no-one is going to applaud you for being single, nor celebrate your wins in a way they do for others. Yep, you heard me right. All in all, it’s fair to say that society can be extremely fixated on conventional accomplishments, specific expectations and mainstream milestones. Ones often intertwined with …
When The Person in Your Situationship Wakes Up Ready For a Label … But Not With You
I’ve been in my fair share of situationships over the past seven years. Apparently, they are on trend. Lucky me, hey! Not really, because the most painful thing about those situations, has been them waking up ready for a label, but not with me. Was I merely the warm up before …
Is Cooking For One Worth it? Absolutely.
Is cooking for one worth it? Absolutely. Although I definitely didn’t feel this way a couple of years back. As someone who lives alone, I was one of those people who hated cooking and to be honest, didn’t think it was worth all the effort of laying out the cutlery, spending …
Why Am I Still Single? The Real Reason …
Why am I still single?. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve asked myself this question. Often accompanied with the following: Am I not a nice person? Deserving of love? Have I not endured and suffered enough frogs? Am I too bossy? Too confident? Should I be less opinionated? …
You are so much more than who you are dating, so change the conversation
It wasn’t until I went single no mingle, that I realized how much dating had become an important part of my conversations with people. And by making who I was dating a highly discussed topic, I had inadvertently sent the message to myself that nothing else was more conversation worthy than …
How Do You Truly Embrace Single?
I used to see single as a situation to survive. It’s taken me years to get to a point of being able to say, ‘I love being single,’ and really mean it. It’s not been easy to trek for sure. However, it has been a lifechanging one. Which all started the …
Picture This. Days of Being Single and Rocking a Different Glow
You wake up early, to sunlight seeping in through your bedroom window and the sound of chirping birds outside. You’re in no rush, enjoying the peacefulness of the moment. Lazily unfolding yourself from the duvet in your own time. You fancy scrambled eggs and coffee so you make them both. Just …
The Single Woman DIYer
When I moved into my first solely owned house, post-divorce at 32, I was buzzing. My own place, to do whatever the hell I liked with. How bloody exciting! And then I quickly realized that I didn’t have a frigging clue how to do any of the things I wanted to …
Online dating: Do We Need to Change The Game?
I mean categorically, yes. That wasn't a trick question. For anyone who’s spent any length of time in the world of online dating, I know you’ll agree, it’s utter shit. I thought upgrading to digital was supposed to make life easier? But when it comes to online dating, it’s added a …
“Are you Married? Dating? Oh, just Single then.”
Rewind back to 2016, where I was 31 and going through a divorce, so newly single. I didn’t plan to be single in my 30s of course, but there it was. Singledom. Suddenly feeling so much more permeable than it had in my teens or 20s. Would I be single forever? …
Intentionally Dating Myself – Learning to Self-Date
Being honest, I started considering the idea of dating myself after a long string of dating failures and bad relationships. I’d become accustomed to these repeated cycles and it sucked, big time. Generally, I’m much better at seeking out highs from other people, than I am at making myself happy, but …
The Problem with Disney’s Prince Charming
As a kid, my sisters and I spent hours watching Disney films over and over again. I still love them so much that even at nearly 40 I’m spending a Sunday afternoon unashamedly watching Encanto … again. But the new era of Disney has a very different narrative to the ones …
Death to Situationships, because I’m fully over the situation
Situationships. It’s that whole ‘we’ve been sleeping together for a while, may have romantic feelings towards one another, but definitely aren’t, ‘together’.’ It’s the relationship that isn’t a relationship at all. They’ve become a dating trend for me over the past seven years and I’ve found it a destructive situation. But …
I’m really over dating. Not just slightly deterred, a little pessimistic but still a tiny bit hopeful. Totally, resolutely out
A slightly belated blog I’ve been sat on for a while, but hear me out … For the first time in my life, I'm really over dating. Not just slightly deterred, a little pessimistic but still a tiny bit hopeful. Totally, resolutely out. Earlier this year an Ex from two and …
If I had to heal from you, I’m absolutely not letting you back into my space
I’ve spent the past year really concentrating on self-care. And not just the bubble baths and countryside walks kind – although definitely important in my opinion. The setting boundaries, making decisions that are healthy and not harmful, practicing a little self-love kind of meaningful mindfulness. As some describe it, I’ve been …
This was truly solo travel. Scary AF, but I was hoping, totally worth it
For the last 10 months I’ve been trying to show myself a little more love by working on some serious (-ly lacking) boundaries, prioritizing self-care and pushing myself out of my comfort zone. Part of that journey has been getting really comfortable spending some alone with myself. So far I’ve tackled …
Is it not socially acceptable to be a single woman?
Socially, being a single woman in her 30s is a weird place to be. There’s like a pariah status that comes with the territory. It’s for this very reason I’ve sometimes struggled myself with the concept of being single. People have made my single status feel like a curse at times. …
Confessions Of A Chameleon Dater: I’ll be anything you want me to be
After six years of dating and still living in the land of singledom, I’ve had cause to question everything about who and also how I date. And I’ve realised something quite alarming; I’ve been a bit of a chameleon dater. “What the hell is a chameleon dater?” I hear you ask. …
23 Empowering Quotes about Being Single, Because Independence is Awesome
Dating myself has been one of the most important things I’ve ever done. It’s been quality single time discovering how to be comfortable and happy in my own presence. And doing it, really did help me discover the love that was missing for myself. These quotes about being single embody the …
Is online dating fundamentally shallow? What you need to know to prepare
When I started online dating six years ago, I was so overwhelmingly unprepared. I mean really though, how hard could it be? Swipe right. Message a bit. Go on a date. If I liked them, go on a few more. However online dating has never felt that simple for me. I …
Navigating the dating virtual marketplace in my 30s: I want quality not quantity
I thought that navigating online dating in my 30s would be a leap forward compared to that era of my early 20s, when I used to try and hold a drunken conversation over deafening music in a sweaty, crowded bar. However, I was wrong. There’s no point reminiscing folks (trust me, …
20 Reasons Why Being Single in Your 30s is Awesome!
When I entered my early 30s newly divorced and freshly single, being on my own seemed to carry this automatic notion that I was failing at life. I must be miserable, incomplete and deeply unhappy with the single situation. There was this instant sense of pity the moment I told anyone …
Have Children or be Childfree: The decision seems to everyone else, inevitable
Are you deciding whether to have children, or opt for a childfree lifestyle? I mean really, why bother? Societal expectations largely come with a presumption that we will eventually make the choice to have children. That we will get there in the end. As if there really wasn't a need to …
“Single is no longer a lack of options – but a choice. A choice to refuse to let your life be defined by your relationship status but to live every day Happily and let your Ever After work itself out.”
